More About the Nature of Our Dialogue

 What's our dialogue practice group good for? Some reminders follow. Some reminders about how the practice is done are also included.

            Well, they can be good for the energizing productive participatory democracy,for getting a step beyond getting on the same page together, for being an interesting parlor game, for practice in the use of a foreign language, and for a way of getting to know one another more deeply! It has been said that an important good of this dialogue practice is coming to better understand the words spoken by another in a democratic ambience can a central purpose of a dialogue practice group.

                I often consider that a central good of the groups is the development of listening skills and a more profound understanding of that which is being said. It is also pretty good as an opportunity to be listened to, heard, understood, and appreciated. 

                I have yet to see these groups worked well on line. Their activity seems best when carried on in face to face groups of less than forty. Live contact seems to be much more productively satisfying than does a virtual group. Productive groups are done seated in a circle of chairs. one person speaks briefly and listened to carefully. This process is dealt with more completely in other essays on this site.

                As usual come to practice with a variety of expectations which often undergo some change with practice. Most participants begin to know their practice companions and to feel comfortable in short order. Most also come to enjoy being well listened to. Others soon begin to feel some real pleasure in coming to better understand others. Some are surprised and the strength of the satisfaction they feel upon noting that they are listening better. Others find satisfaction in finding that they are better modulating and projecting their voices in this atmosphere.

                Later many practicants begin to discover how valuable the rules and practices they are integrating are. They begin to understand the nature of their values and to value them more deeply.

                Mostly the practice is simple and enjoyable.The practice is not complicated, but it does need to be practiced in order to enjoy its benefits. There are skills to be practiced and, probably, some attitudes to develop.

                The dialogue differs greatly from a gathering of 20 or so wherein ten may be speaking at once, little is heard, listening to much is impossible, and even the thread of a topic may not be maintained. That which is said is little understood or even heard. Participants may find little joy or value in the process.

                In the dialogue most of the process is listening and hearing with and active interest in understanding. Also the intention is that each and every participant gets and opportunity to speak and to be heard. This is not a time to "make a speech." But, most often there is a topic and each has a minute or two of quite attentive listeners. Most of our practice will be listening for understanding practice and certainly not a time for planning your response. The practice is mostly listening for greater understanding then is often usual. Understanding may be your reward and you will also have the pleasure of having your words listen to and come to be understood.

                I intend to respond to your questions and to your requests for explanations in future posts here.

                Thank you for reading.

                                                                      Richard Sheehan           

 

         

         

    

Doing It

Ways of do this dialogue: 

                This dialogue may be done in a variety of ways. The ways possible may approach the infinite. It can be done beneficially in a great many ways. Ways that suit the needs of its members.

                Many of these ways have several doings in common. There maybe none of these ways which can be left out without affecting the groups effectiveness. The short list of doings which come to is to practice:

practice democracy.

inclusive participation.

live "face to face" listening and speech. listening skills.

saying something.

showing up.

                All the ways I have thought of for doing this dialogue call for a group of  people. Size matters, but a variety of sizes may prove effective. In most cases a group of over 40 participants will usually less less effective than a group of about 20. The dialogue can be useful for a married couple. A nine person group may do, but may soon feel the need for "new blood." 

The group:

                Ah, the group. This dialogue nearly always calls for a group. You may find that a group of about 17 participants can work very well. A group to be very useful ought to meet regularly. Meeting once a week for an hour or two can be great. One that meets once every three months may fall apart before the end of the first year. Members ought to share a common language, but do not need to be native speaks of that language. A dialogue group could have as a purpose, the practice of speaking a "second language."

                So, you may see that the purpose of your group can affect its make-up. The nature of your group can depend upon your purpose.

                A typical group will be doing some ongoing recruitment of new members.

                

The meeting place can be important to the practice of a dialogue group:

                The meeting place can be very important for nearly every group. The meeting place ought to be neutral so meeting at members homes can present problems. The place ought to be free from interruptions or any disruption and a minimum of discomforts. Also, for me, it is important that the area of the place be large enough to seat members in a single continuous circle. So, chairs are necessary and it is good that the chairs be of a similar nature.

                So it seems that something about the nature and setup of the meeting place ought to be included in the list above. The setup of the chairs is important

to the egalitarian nature of the meeting. The setting of the chairs contribute much to the quality of the dialogue and is part of the practice of democracy.

                It is most often best that the time a place of meeting be consistent. Each and every member needs to kept up to date as to that time and place.

                

As a matter of interest:

                I have my personal preferences for dialogue practice meetings. For example, I like a talking stick. Here at this blogsite are more than 50 essays about the dialogue and its practice. They are free for your perusal.

                This site has a month average of only about 400 viewers, though last month there were over 2,000 views. However, as this has one of my least viewed sites I have thought that it might be useful to combine it with my Governance With RCS site. Dialogue of some sort is probably vital for good governance. So, essays on democratic dialogue would not be out of place there. Have you thoughts on such a move? I'll try not to make any sudden moves.

                Thank you for reading.

                                                                                        rcs

Who Is Interested in Interacting With This Site?

                I will ramble on a bit longer here but it seems it is getting close to time to shut down Dialogue With RCS for lack of interest. The site has been up for over two years and is averaging only about 400 views a month and in that time I have only been contacted once. I incorrectly expected more exchanges with readers and perhaps some "How to" questions.

            I will keep you informed about my intentions. It may be useful for me to move some of this site to the Governance With RCS site. The Dialogue is an important part of governance and taking care of ourselves together.

Another Ramble Into Dialogue Practice:

            This piece seems to be mostly about what the dialogue is and a little about why I find it interesting and a bit about other stuff. I do not intend to say anything about how to practice the dialogue today. How is a big topic in which it seems few are interested.

           The what of the dialogue is that it can be a good way to meaning and understanding, shared meaning and understanding. It can be about kinds of peace, basketball, relationships, or whatever we like. These days I am interested in dialogue about taking care of ourselves together. I call that governance.

            However, The Dialogue is about effective dialogue. It is not complicated, but it does take practice. There are skills to practice, rules to integrate, and good practices to practice.

            In the practice you can find humor, fun, smiles, some laughter. You can also find satisfaction and new skills. You can find empowering meaning and understanding. Perhaps you can find companionship and co-operation. You may find yourself maintaining culture or even creating culture. You will get to know your practice companions better.

            It can be a supporting and strengthening process, and you do most of it with just the support of your group. I see it something like an adult primary and secondary school with no kindergarten. I can be much faster, but we find that we often have to learn one thing before we learn another.

            The practice includes the development of listening skills that helps us to a more useful understanding of our practice companions, ourselves, and the human world. Our developing listening skills bring more and more meaning and understanding into our lives. We begin to find satisfaction and joy by partaking of this kind of democratic talk. The practice may even let more peace and abundance into one's life.

            The dialogue includes being listened to. I the dialogue we can be heard. Speaking of being heard, the dialogue is communion among a group of individuals. It is not a monologue. For me to advance understanding of the dialogue I need a lot of ongoing feedback. I need to know you better to write to you better. I want to write about the dialogue in more detail, more systematically, in ways more appropriate to your wants, needs, and interests. The topic is broad and and can be deep.

            I often see the dialogue as a democratic stream of meaning flowing among us and through us. Still the dialogue can be much like a parlor game that most of can enjoy and still be a meaningful practice. Even as a parlor game there can be stream of growing meaning and understanding flowing among us which might not notice or give a conscious thought to. Still that flow of meaning and understanding created by us energizes new and meaningful understanding among us.

         

            The shared meaning we create with our dialogue is a force which helps us to more peaceful and meaningful families and relationships, helps us to co-operate locally more effectively, and helps us to more healthy societies nations. and to a more useful, resistant, and meaningful culture. 

The Dialogue is Not:    

~ the analysis found in discussion nor is it an effort to persuade anyone

~ an attempt to gain points.

~ an attempt to make any particular point prevail.

            This dialogue practice is a safer, more useful way to honestly share meaning, experience, 0pinion, assumption, and understanding. And this little essay is headed for more ramble. I hope it will turn out to be useful ramble through some valuable orientation and information.

            I hope that you have begun to suspect that the dialogue is likely to hold benefits for you. I believe that it has a variety of benefits for a variety of individuals. One can be surprised to find that a single minute they have to express an opinion of theirs to an attentive groups has real value for them. They are please to know that there can be many such minutes. Others feel there is important benefit in having the words they express are listen to heard with the intention of understanding. Others feel that the knowledge that each will have and equitable opportunity to be heard and that all will have equal opportunity to be heard. All of this can happen in the first grade.

            We all may come to appreciate the benefits in learning and practicing listening skills. Nearly all can benefit practicing speaking skills. Others are gaining hearing and understanding skills, and benefiting.

            All benefit and are please that many are gaining skills at expressing themselves at an extraordinary level of honesty. 

            Others  may feel that they benefit just by learning to accept that which another says is valuable information. Accepting it as valuable not necessarily for being true or something to be believed. But seeing it rather as a representation of another's opinion, interpretation, or experience. That is as a way to a deeper understanding of another whose opinions are very different from one's own.

            Individuals benefit in a variety of individual ways. For me and others a great benefit seems to center on a flow of meaning which begins to flow through a practice group. That flow can lead to a kind of thinking together in face of great differences discovered in a group. That sort of thinking together is sometimes very powerful, perhaps more powerful than the sum of that of all individual inputs

The Practice Calls For Your Effort:

    You will need to work the practice to gain your benefits. Listening, hearing, understanding call for your attention and more. Showing up and keeping appropriate silence take effort. Co-operating with your fellow dialoguers may be a pleasure, but also calls for effort. Learning the mechanics of this dialogue takes effort which may be called work.

            You can gain certain skills and understandings. You may gain some shared meaning and culture. Showing up may be a bit of a job. But there are more advantages. You can gain word power and voice projection. It is possible to gain a more peaceful and meaningful life. Some improve their use of a language which is not their own.

            This is about all the ramble in can handle today.

        If  you have an idea for practicing dialogue online, please share it. Remember, members must recognize each other and begin to know each other. You may use the "comments" app below.

            Their are other dialogue posts to explore at this site. You are welcome to explore them.

            Thanks for going on this ramble.

                                                                                                rcs

        

             

Dialogue Practice Group Benefits

More meaning in you your life, better understand of others, a way to a better world, being listened to.  

           

                On this new blog I intend to continue a number of posts on a kind of dialogue with which you may be becoming familiar. Some churches, corporations, civic organizations, and others have been benefiting from this sort of dialogue for years, so it is not brand new.

               

                For those who may not be certain of what I mean by dialogue, In brief, it is meaningful talk within groups.

                

                Below I will begin to note a few of the dialogue's benefits. As we are now on the internet I will say now that, I do not know of cases of the dialogue's being used successfully online. However, I believe that it is now possible to do so, but am not sure how. If you would like to suggest something the "comments" window below is for your use.

                

                As I know it, the dialogue is best used face to face, in person. And seems most effective in groups of between 20 and 40 participants. Groups of 15 and less have been please with it. Much of it can be used to good effect between husband and wife. It has been used with groups with groups much larger than 40 with professional facilitators and more as a demonstration than as well functioning group. I would like to see it use online. 

                

                The following list is far from inclusive and not completely representative, but can serve to introduce something of the dialogue.

                I am calling it the dialogue now, have called it Magic Table Dialogue and Dialogue For Peace.

                    

 Benefits include:

~ learning to make yourself heard.

~ being heard.

~ being listened to.

~ coming to enjoy being heard.

~ an opportunity for the practice of listening.

~ learning that dialogue is more than talk.

~ gaining motivation to listen.

~ improving your use of language.

~ practicing a language new to you.

~ learning new listening skills.

~ the possibility of getting in touch with traditions of knowledge new to you. 

~ getting to know yourself better.

~ getting to know an interesting other.

~ knowing new people.

~ having fun while realizing that the dialogue is a serious activity.

~ experiencing the creation of culture. 

~  increasing your word power.

~ Seeing how better dialogue can be a way to a better world.

~ sharing meaning and understanding.

~ the possibility of beginning an interesting new exploration with safe, comfortable "baby steps." Still there might come a time that you will want to take a step beyond your comfort zone.

~ improving your ability understand others, even those quite different from you.

~ learning more of the effect of assumptions in our lives.

~ the possibility of increased meaning and understanding in our lives.

                                     

                 More to come.

               

                Thank you for reading!

                                                                                                              RCS

 

 

Learning to Organize as We Organize to Learn

 Co-operation:

                There is a hope among us that we can effectively co-operate for our mutual well-being; that is to co-operate for the well-being of our health, education, economy, civic life, and more. We know about co-operation, but many of us seem to be out of practice. 

                In order to organize to get something going, or to keep it going, we need to co-operate pretty well. That takes talking, it takes communication, and it takes practice. To keep on the same track or on the same page, often takes an ongoing conversation or dialogue. Carrying on a dialogue conversation effectively takes some practice and a bit of learning. 

Practice:

                We could practice such dialogue as we teach each other active citizenship, self governance, and participatory democracy, if we would.

                Learning to practice the dialogue effectively can be an important first step. Learn to use the dialogue is a very useful in many collective activities. the practice of the dialogue makes us better co-operators and more effective doers. Use of the dialogue is a great aid to organizing and and more effective learning as we become more effective organizers.

Listening and Acton:

                Dialogue practice leads us to be more meaningful listeners and understanders. The dialogue is a way to think co-operatively, to act usefully, and effectively. It can be a way to beautiful action. It can move us beautiful action. It can move us to powerful and broadly meaningful action when we so will.

                You can explore our growing blogsites of dialogue and governance when you so will. You can check the list of associated blogs here whenever you care to. Find out more about dialogue skills and how to use them at the dialogue and the governance sites here.

                Thank you for reading.

                                                                                                        rcs

Dialogue Groups

 Dialogue  Practice Is  

      

It can look like a parlor game:               

 It is not about dice or pairs it is a lot about group communication. There is a bit to learn. It may seem like a parlour game and it is a little like that and there is some fun in it, but it can have a much bigger payoff. 

                Our dialogue talk is designed to create areas of coherence in the vastness of misunderstanding. Often a major benefit of our dialogue is to give us a better chance to experience the power of collectively shared meaning which we have created. Most ordinary talk in our society may be called incoherent. To learn to do our dialogue talk, takes ongoing practice. This practice we have called Dialogue for Peace, Magic Table Dialogue, and just The Dialogue. The Dialogue has rules which call for practice. The rules need not be rigid, but they do call for practice which is important. 

It can be a worthy effort:                

The Dialogue is aimed at learning to think together coherently. Thinking together coherently calls for sustained practice. An early practice may be called a listening practice, but calls for some use of your voice as well as of your ears and mind. Thinking together is both satisfying and a great power.  We believe that it is well worth the effort.

                This thinking together is a learning and growth process. It occurs on various levels of consciousness. It occurs in one, in mental talk to one's self, or even on unspoken levels. We could just say that a lot of learning goes on in dialogue practice.

                Make comments below. I respect suggestions and am grateful for them.
Suggestions about how the dialogue might be done online can benefit us.
You may place whatever you have to say in the "Comment" area below anonymously, with a pen name, or just your regular name.

                   Search this blog with one of the several avenues of search available in the side  columns. 

 

                                                                                                  

                                                                                                                      RCS

Group Dialogue Practice: hints for creating successful group practice

                                This whole blog is much about group dialogue practice and this is more on that same theme. Dialogue of this sort is often called social dialogue. Social dialogue has been called a pillar of social resiliance and cohesion. It makes our co-operation more powerfully effective. It may be that which makes human and humane co-operation possible. Using language is a marvel of humanity. By the time you have read a dozen of these little essays, you will have provided yourself the ability to recognize a successful dialogue group and know much of the reasons why it is successful.

Hints:

~In the very beginning it helps to have at least 6 or 7 interested persons committed to three or four consecutive meetings. This could be called your pilot group. Forty practicants is too many for most well working groups.

~ During practice one person addresses the group as a whole and avoids directing her words to only a few persons at a time.

~ The practice is mostly a listening practice with one person speaking and the rest listening. Even so, all intened to make sure that every one has an equal opportunity to speak.

~ Remember that the speaker is most likely doing his best to be honest and to make his words understood.

~ Avoid interrupting another. You will have your chance to speak and other times to listen. The dialogue continues so that there is more oppertunity to understand and to be understood. If a speaker is interrupted several listeners may be interrupted and so the effectiveness of the practice may be damaged.

~ Keep expenses to a minimum. Everyone helps take care of necessary expenses, Do your part as you are able to.

~ Listen well to that which the speaker is saying. Improved understanding is an aimof your group.

~ Practice listening wel and gain more powerful listening and understanding skills.

~ Encourage each and every one to use their opportunity to say something at each meeting. Their words and yours are gifts to each of us.

~ Usually limit speaking to one or two minutes. It is great to have time to speak more than once at a meeting.

~ Rememvber that focusing dialogue on the topic and on personal experience is good practice.

    

                          The hints offered here can be useful for keeping the practice pleasant and effective, but are far from all inclusive or comprehensive. There is much more offered in other posts on this blog. Consider beginning a practice group of your own, if you have not already done so.

                        Thank you for your visit and for reading.

                                                                                                        rcs

            

This Practice is old and it is New, It's Powerful Too

The Practice of  Dialogue 

          Dialogue including: A bit of a definition of our usefully different kind of dialogue. You may have heard or read information before. Read it again here and make sure that it is active in your memory. It is important that you do so. You will benefit.

              I write about a new kind of dialogue. It is mostly for groups of as small as 9 to groups of about 39. 

            Below are some descriptive notes about what is, and what it is not. See other posts on the benefits of this more productive and satisfying way to communicate. It can work wonders with your husband and has been successful in some very large groups.

Our dialogue practice is not a:

~ place to make a particular point prevail.

~ debate or even a discussion. 

~ time to attempt to make points.

~ game to win or lose.

 

This new dialogue practice is a way to:

~ meaning and understanding.

~ an activity which helps us to be us.

~ through the meaning of word.

~ an honest, supportive activity.   

~ greater awareness and enhanced consciousness.

~ hone your listening skills.

~ develop new speaking skills.

~ effective methods of communication. 

~ cultural preservation and creation.

~ make a healthy, effective society more probable.

~ meet interested people in an interesting environment.

~ put honest thoughts "on the table" where we can look at them and begin to find their meaning.

~ be heard.

~ find pleasure in speaking-up.

~ understanding among us and within us.

~ satisfying relationship.

~ exchange idea and opinion more safely. 

~ share experience.

~ more effective communication beyond the group.

~ practice a "second" language.

~ peace and good will.

~ to see our words as gifts.

According to Dr. David Bohm a similar dialogue practice is:

~ participating in a flow of meaning between us, through us, and among us.

~ an activity out of which emerges new and renewed understanding.

~ an activity which helps us to be an us.

            Could you find a way to practice a dialogue of this sort? Could you practice a dialogue more of this sort in your group?

            You can open a window below to make a comment, a suggestion, and ask a question. You might have to click on where where "no comment" is printed below.

            Thanks for reading. 

                                                                                RCS